Hetalia glee club
by Glimer
Summary: All the nations have decided to go to high school. But, what they find there is not what they expected. A spin off of glee. I added some of my own characters. Rated T because it's hetalia and glee.
1. Pilot

Mr. Shoe- Himself

Sue Sylvester- Herself

(I put in my friends and I, just cause))

Rachel Berry- Not appearing, but taken place by me

Tina Chang- Taken by Lydia

Mercedes Jones - Taken by Amanda

Finn Hudson- Alfred F. Jones (America)

Curt Hummel- Arthur Kirkland (England)

Noah Puckerman (also known as Puck)- Gilbert Beilshmidt (Prussia)

Quinn Fabrae- Francoise Bonnefoy (Fem!france)

Brittany last name- Feliks (Poland)

Santana Lopez- Isabel (Fem!Span kinda also 2p!/ dark just like mean, okay?)

Artie- Matthew Williams (Canada)

Through out this entire story I mean American football. I'm American, so I didn't really think about it before, sorry...

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Regular school, in a regular town. William McKinley High School, to be specific. Just like any other High School, the populars ruled the school. Then, came the normal people, the bible bashers, the freaks, the geeks, the ones thinking about how to go from level 69 to 70 druid, and everyone else. Because, if you don't fall into a category you had to find one.

"You think this is hard? Try being water boarded, that's hard!"

Hetalia glee club.

Mr. Shoe pulled up into the parking, in his beat up car, just like every other day of school. He got out, trying to keep his coffee in his hand.

"Making some new friends, Arthur?" he asked the transfer student, from England. Who, just like every other morning, was being surrounded by a good amount of the football team near a dumpster. His eyes widened in horror, as the group of guys around him split for the teacher.

"He sure is, Mr. Shoe!" butted in Gilbert.

"Hey, Al, you still owe me that report on lo que hiciste el verano pasado." The teacher said, moving on.

"What?" asked the confused football Captain.

"What you did last summer." The teacher walked away.

"Almost halfway done, with almost all of it. Uh, Mr. Shoe."

"It's hammer time!" Said Gilbert, once the teacher was gone.

"Please, my mumsy made me these scones!" squealed the brit, holding tightly to the lunch bag.

"Wait" said Al flatly. Gil ripped the bag from his hands, and set fire to it.

"Okay" said a satisfied Alfred. Gilbert then proceeded to put the brit in the dumpster.

~:~:~:~:~

Mr. Shoe proudly looked at the old glee trophies. The ones he held in 1993.

~:~:~:~:~

Jessica glared into the quire room as a boy sang.

"_Where is love?" _he sang, as the teacher below him played piano. While instructing him, the teacher pulled of his sweater. The older man put his hand back, and hit the younger man's stomach.

"Sorry, son." he apologized. Jessica smirked at this accident.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"Hey did you hear that Sam got fired?" asked Miss. Pillsbury, while cleaning off her grapes.

"Who's gonna take over glee club?"

~:~:~:~~:~:~:~

"I want to take over glee club." Stated Mr. Shoe.

"You want to Captain the Titanic Two?" asked Principal Figgins.

"I think I could make it great again. There is no joy in these kids. They feel invisible, that's why every one of them has a MySpace page." explained the teacher. The principal leaned back in his chair.

"Sixty bucks a month. That's what I need to keep this program up."

"A-and, you expect me to pay it?" asked Mr. Shoe.

"Well, I'm certainly not going to pay for it. We're not talking about cheerleaders here, Will. They were on Fox Sports Net last year. When glee club starts bringing that kind of presses to this school again, you can have all the money you want. Until then, sixty bucks a month and you've got to use the clothes and props you already have." Mr. Shoe hung up the sign up list later.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"My name is Amanda and I'm singing- _R-E-S-P-E-C-T find out what it means to me. R-E-S-P-E-C-T take care of T-C-P. Oh!" _

"Hello I'm Arthur Kirkland, and I'll be singing Hello, Goodbye. _You say yes, and I say no. You say stop, and I say go, go, go!" _

"Lydia B. Stereotypes song. _I think I love you more, than the Japanese love tentacle porn. And, we should dance dance dance dance. To these stereotypes." _

"Hi my name is Jessica, and I'll be singing Back to December."

"Fantastic, let's hear it." said Mr. Shoe.

"_I'm so glad you made time to see me. How's life tell me how's your family, I haven't seen them in a while. You've been good busier than ever. Small talk, work and the weather your guard is up and I know why. Cause the last time you saw me, is still burned in the back of your mind. You gave me roses, and I left them there to die." _

While each and every one of them got slushied while at the sign ups, they still wanted to do this.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"_And, I said to myself sit down!" _sang Matthew.

"_Said to myself sit down!" _all the others sang. It wasn't a very good rehearsal.

"We suck!" declared Jessica, as Matthew's wheel chair crashed into the wall.

"It'll get there, we just need to keep rehearsing." assured Mr. Shoe.

"Mr. Shoe do you know how ridiculous it is to give the lead solo to "Sit down you're rocking the boat", to a boy in a wheel chair?" asked Amanda.

"I-I think Mr. Shoe is using irony to enhance the performance." suggested Matt.

"Really bad irony." concluded Lydia, while the others agreed.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"Hey, Sue. Can I have a sec?" Mr. Shoe asked Sue.

"Sure buddy, come on in." she responded. Will smiled,and sat down.

"So, you wanna talk to my cheerios about joining glee club?"

"Well, I need more kids. Performers, and all the best ones are your cheerleaders. So, I figured some of them might want to double up."

"Okay, so what you're doing right now is called blurring the lines." Explained Sue, while making her sports drink. "High School is a caste system. Kids fall into certain slots. Your jocks, and your popular kids up in the pent house. The invisibles and the ones playing live action druids and warlocks. Bottom floor."

"Uh-huh. And, where do the glee kids lie?" asked Mr. Shoe.

"Sub- basement." Sue replied flatly. "If you really care about these kids, you'll leave them alone. Children like to know where they stand, so let your little glee kids have their little club. But, don't pretend that any of them are something they're not."

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

Mr. Shoe went to go look at the sign up sheet he put up in the boy's locker room. All it read was:

Gaylord Weiner

Butt Lunch, and...

Penis.

Mr. Shoe thought it was the end. There could be no new directions.

"_Even as I wonder." _Wait, was somebody singing? Mr. Shoe walked around the corner over to the showers. _"I'm keeping you in sight." _No. It couldn't be. _"You're a candle in the window, on a cold dark winter's night." _It was. That voice. That perfect male lead voice, belonged to Alfred F. Jones. The captain of the football team. The most anti- gay guy out there. _"And, I'm getting closer than I ever thought I might!" _Mr. Shoe made sure no one could see him, and expertly hid behind the lockers. While, Alfred continued to sing in the shower. _"And, I can't fight this feeling anymore!" _Alfred pretended to play the drums. 'I suddenly realized why I had wanted to do this thing in the first place.' Thought Mr. Shoe. 'It was seeing the gift in a kid that they didn't even know they had.'

"_And, I can't fight this feeling anymore!" _

'It was pure talent. What I did then, was the blackest moment of my life.'

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

Mr. Shoe pushed the small package of medical pot in front of Alfred. Mr. Shoe had gotten it from a friend, and wasn't planning on using it. Chronic Lady was printed on the front, so cops couldn't get upset.

"You wanna tell me how long you've had a drug problem?" he asked.

"I-I don't even know who the Chronic Lady is!" Alfred argued.

"Look, if it were up to me we wouldn't have locker checks."

"I've never seen that before in my life, Mr. Shoe! I swear! I'll pee in a cup!" Mr. Shoe gave Al a "what the fuck" look.

"I'll pee." The student repeated.

"It wouldn't make any difference. Possession is eight tenths of the law. And, I'm pretty sure that much pot is a felony. You'll get kicked out of school. You'll loose your football scholarship."

"Wait, I have a football scholarship? T-To where?" Alfred asked.

"You could land in prison, son."

"Oh my god." Suddenly the help the kids poster in Mr. Shoe's office, became much more prominent.

"Please! Don't tell my mom!" Alfred begged the teacher. Mr. Shoe sighed.

"Look, I see a lot of myself in you, Al. I know what it's like to struggle to make good life choices. But, I don't want to see you throw away everything you have to offer the world. I just expected more out of you, Al."

"We have two options here. I'm running detention now, so you can do six weeks after school." said Mr. Shoe. "But, that's gonna remain on your permanent record."

"What's the other option, Mr. Shoe?"

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"_I got chills. They're multiplying! And, I'm loosing control." _Alfred bellowed at glee rehearsals, catching everyone's attention. _"Cause the power, you're supplying. It's electrifying!" _

"_You better shape up!" _Jessica sang after him.

"_Do, do, do!" _everyone sang after her.

"_Cause I need a man! And, my heart is set on you!" _

"_Do, do, do!" _

"_You better shape up! You better understand! To must heart I must be true!" _

"_Nothing left. Nothing left for me to do!" _Alfred chocked out, as both he and Jessica stepped forward.

"_You're the one that I want!" _They both sang.

"_You are the one I want!" _sang everyone behind them.

"_Oo, ooo, ooo, honey!" _Everyone sang together. _"The one that I want!" _

"Oh, hell to the no!" Amanda screamed, stepping forward. "Look, I'm not down with this background singing non-sense! I am the star here!"

"Okay, Amanda. It's just one song." Mr. Shoe argued.

"And, the first time we've been kind of good." Added Arthur. Lydia stepped up to argue, since it is her specialty.

"Okay, you're good football star. I'll give you that, but you'd better bring it!"

"Let's run it again." Butted in Jessica, breaking up the fight.

"Alright, let's do it!" said an excited Mr. Shoe. "From the top!"

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

Gilbert picked up a football, doing his signature laugh. He was targeting a freshman the walked in front of him, when he heard the coach yelling at Alfred.

"Hey, what's going on?" He asked as Alfred walked his way.

"Oh, I just have to miss practice Saturday afternoon." he nervously laughed off. "My mom, I gotta help her cook, and do things."

"Why?" Gilbert asked. "She's not even your mom, you're a nation remember.

"She's been like one to me. All I have are these last years of high school, then I have to leave her."

"Yeah, well we all gotta have fake parents. Mine suck, but I don't actually care about them."

"Well, she's as close of a mom as I'll ever have."

"Anyways, what's wrong with her?"

"Oh, she uh. Just had, uh, surgery." Alfred said, thinking he had gotten out of it.

"What kind of surgery?" Gil asked.

"Had to have her prostate. Yeah." Alfred said. Gilbert nodded.

"That's a tough break."

"Yeah." Said Al, dismissing the subject.

"You think this is hard? I'm living with hepatitis! That's hard!" They heard Coach Sue scream.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"Chicks don't have prostates!" Gil yelled at Al, as he walked out of rehearsals. Al looked at all the guys around him, clutching paint ball guns. "I looked it up. You broke the rules! And, for that you must be punished." Everyone around Alfred held up their guns.

"W-Wait! You've got the power here! You don't have to do this!" Alfred argued, while backing up against a wall. Before he knew it, Alfred was covered in green paint and shells.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"You're leaving us? W-When?" Matthew asked Mr. Shoe.

"I left a two weeks notice. But, I promise you guys I'll find a great replacement before I go." Mr. Shoe breathed, standing in the cold auditorium. What other choice did he have? He wife was pregnant, and they couldn't provide with a teacher's salary. They could barley provide now. He had to become an accountant. End of story.

"Is this because those kids we saw last week were so good. Then , we can work harder." Protested Amanda.

"This isn't fair, Mr. Shoe, we can't do this without you." Jessica said.

"Well-" began Lydia, before everyone shushed her.

"So, does that mean that I don't have to be in the club anymore?" Alfred asked.

"This isn't about you guys." explained Mr. Shoe. "Being an adult is about having to make difficult choices. Sorta like high school, but sometimes you have to give up the things that you love. One day you guys are gonna grow up and understand that. I have loved being your teacher." Mr. Shoe turned his back to the group of kids, and walked away. All of them watched with sad faces as he left he auditorium.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

Alfred closed his locker, only to find Jessica looking at him.

"Didn't see you at glee club today." She said flatly.

"That still happening?" He asked.

"I've taken over."

"Oh."

"I'm intern director, but I expect the position will become permanent." Francoise walked over with Isabel.

"Hi Al." She said. Francoise turned Jessica's way. "Group call." She turned back to Alfred. "What are you doing talking to her?"

"I-I" Alfred stuttered.  
"Science project." Jessica interjected. "We're partners."

"Study session tonight, my house." Said Francoise, walking off.

"That's great." Said Al, clearly staring at her butt. "Look I should go." He said. "I can't do glee anymore, it conflicts with-"  
"Your reputation?" Jessica asked. "You've really got something, Al. And, you're throwing it away."

"Look, I'm gonna be late."

"You can't keep worrying about what people think of it. You're better than all of them." Jessica walked off, to her next class.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"What do you want me to do? Apologize?" asked Gil, as he and Alfred walked off the football field. "That's unawesome. Look, if I joined the flag team. You'd beat the crap outta me. I just don't understand why you did it!"

"Mr. Shoe told me he'd give me enough extra credit to pass Spanish if I joined the club, okay? I didn't have a choice. If I failed another class I'd be off the team. Look, it's over. Okay? I quit. Anything else?" "That's it, and as a welcome back to the world of the normal. I got you a present." Gil walked off. Alfred heard distressed cries for help.

"What's that noise?" he asked, before following. The rest of the team stood laughing by the porta-potties.

"Is someone in there?" Alfred asked.

"We got that wheel chair kid inside." Alfred knew they meant Matthew, the boy who was also Canada. He was pretending to be in a wheel chair for some reason, while all the nations went through school. Usually Alfred wouldn't mind, because he would forget who it was. But, glee club made him like Matthew. "We're gonna flip it." Gil laughed.

"Isn't that kind of dangerous?" Alfred insisted.

"He's already a cripple!" One of the kids suggested. Alfred could see Gil frown a little, since he knew Matthew was just playing a part. Alfred shook his head, and opened up the porta-potty.

"Thank you. Thank you so much." Matthew whispered, while being wheeled out by Alfred. "My god the smell." Matthew muttered. "Al, you need to ban these things from your country."

"What the hell, dude!" someone yelled.  
"I can't believe you're helping out this loser!" came another call.

"You don't get it, man. We're all losers. Everyone in this school. No, everyone in this town! So, I'm going to try and be the hero." Alfred turned to wheel Matthew away. Alfred began to remember why all the nations came here. They all thought it essential to have a common knowledge, and since America's school's were the easiest they choose this one. They didn't come here to separate, and be hateful. And, while they were here why not make a difference?

~:~:~:~:~:~:~::~:~:~

"Look, you guys these steps are not hard! I've been doing them since pre-school!" Amanda yelled.

"I'm sorry, did I miss the election for queen? Cause I didn't vote for you!" Jessica snapped.

"You vote for royalty! You bloody American git!" yelled Arthur.

"I know what I'm talking about, I've actually taken dance classes!" Amanda argued. Everyone got distracted by Alfred wheeling in Matthew. Arthur smiled, like it reminded him of something.

"This is a closed rehearsal." Said an annoyed Lydia.

"Look, I owe you guys an apology." Alfred placed Matthew beside Jessica, while Amanda stood beside Arthur.

"I never should have quit. I-I don't wanna be the guy that just drives around throwing eggs at people! I came to high school for a reason!"

"That was you?" Jessica asked.

"You and Pru- I mean your friends threw pee balloons at me." Complained Arthur.

"I know." Alfred said.

"You nailed all my lawn furniture to my roof."

"I wasn't actually there for that one, but I'm really sorry... Look , that isn't who I am. I'm a hero!" Lydia snorted. "Heroes don't pick on people, they do the unexpected."

"So, you're here because you think you're a hero?" asked Amanda.

"I AM a hero." Alfred corrected. "But, no. This makes me happy, and this is what I want to do."

"Artie, you play guitar. Right?" The Brit nodded at him.

"Think you could recruit a jazz band?"

"I'd get you a punk one sooner."

"All right!" Alfred exclaimed.

"Jessica and Lydia. We need outfits, and they've got to be cool. You think you can do that?"

"Damn, don't you see what I got on?" Jessica motioned to herself, while Lydia just nodded her head. She was getting a headache, and wasn't very happy.

"Amanda, you can do choreography." Amanda smiled, and nodded before sticking her tongue out to Jessica and Lydia.

"And, exactly what are you doing Ame- uh, idiot?" Arthur asked.

"I've got the music!" Smiled Alfred.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"_Just a small town girl." _Alfred sang. _"Living in a lonely world. She took the midnight train going anywhere." _

"_And, just a city boy." _Sang Jessica. _"Born and raised in South Detroit, he took the midnight train going anywhere." _

"_A singer in a smoky room." _Amanda cut in.

"_The smell of wine and cheap perfume." _Arthur joined.

"_For a smile, they can share the night." _Matthew sang.

"_It goes on and on and on and on!" _Lydia joined. They all looked out to the empty auditorium.

"_Strangers waiting. Up and down the boulevard. They're shadows, searching in the night. Street lights. People. Living just to find emotion. Hiding Somewhere in the night!" _All of the members chorused. Mr. Shoe walked in when he heard the kids singing from the hall. He stood by the door frame. Alfred ran over to the drums, and began to lay down a beat.

"_Working hard to get my fill!" _Jessica sang again.

"_Everybody wants a thrill!" _ Alfred sang.

"_Paying anything to roll the dice, just one more time!" _The two chorused.

"_Some will win!" _Amanda sang.

"_Some will loose!" _Arthur looked up to Amanda, while playing his guitar.

"_Some were born to sing the blues~!" _They both sang together.

"_OH! The movie never ends! It goes on and on and on and on!" _Lydia and Matthew butted in.

"_Don't stop believing! Hold on to that feeling! Street lights! People!" _Coach Sue, along with some cheerleaders glared down at the club. _"Don't stop believing! Hold on to that feeling!" _Gilbert looked through the doorway at the group, ashamed of his friend. If they were going to go to high school, they were supposed to make it fun. _"Street Lights! People! Don't stop~!" _

Mr. Shoe began to clap.

"Good guys." He said. "That's a nine, we need a ten. Jessica, you need to hit the ones and the fives. Al, I think if you worked on it you could hit a high B."

"So, does this mean you're staying?" Alfred asked.

"It would kill me to see you win nationals without me." Mr. Shoe said flatly. Everyone smiled at each other. "From the top!" Mr. Shoe yelled.


	2. Showmance

Mr. Schu parked in the school parking lot, with his clunker car. Just like every other day.

"Mr. Schuester!" Jessica called.

"Yeah?" he asked, while she ran up to him.

"I went to the library. And I got some sheet music, and I wanted to run some songs by you that feature me heavily on lead vocal."

"Thanks, Jess. But, I already got one picked out." He responded. Jessica almost dropped her bag, when Alfred came over.

"Let me help you with that." He said, taking the bag.

"Thanks, Al. You're so chivalrous." She smiled.

"Thanks!" He replied. "That's a good thing, right"

"Morning guys~!" Mr. Schu called to Matthew, Amanda, and Lydia.

"Hey, Mr. Schu! We're just learning some runs." Said Amanda happily.

"Oh, yeah?" The teacher asked.

"Yeah, it goes. OH~!" Sang Amanda.

"OH~!" The other three repeated. Amanda laughed joyfully.

"Pretty fly, but you might want to work on it." Amanda joked.

"Oh, why thank you." Said Mr. Schu, walking the other direction. "Hey! Don't be late for rehearsals this afternoon!"

"Okay~!" Lydia called back. She was actually in a good mood today.

"Alright!" Mr. Schu called back. "Morning Arthur!" He said cheerfully to the English boy at the dumpster with the football team. Arthur gave him a 'seriously?' look.

"Buenos Nachos, Mr. Schu." Gilbert said.

"Hey!" Mr. Schu laughed. "Let's go, titans!"

"Come on!" Said Gilbert, when the teacher was gone. He began to pick up the English student.

"Wait!" Arthur yelled. He threw his book bag at one of the large guys. "One day you will all work for me." He declared. The football players ignored him, and proceeded to throw him in the dumpster.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"Oh!" yelled Mr. Schu, bumping into Miss. Pillsbury.

"Oh, sorry Will!" she said, surprised. "Gosh, hi."

"Hey, Emma." He said happily, upon seeing his friend. "Uh, I wanted to thank you so much for the advice you gave me the other day. I mean, teaching here and coaching glee club. It's where I belong."

"Oh, well it's no problem." She replied. "You know, I give consul and give guidance. Cause I'm a guidance consular."

"Yeah, you are." Mr. Schu laughed.

"So- Oh look! We match periwinkle!" Miss. Pillsbury pointed out their shirts.

"Yeah." Said Mr Schu, noticing his shirt.

"Get a room!" Scoffed Isabelle, at the top of the stairs.

"Ms. Sylvester wants to see you in her office, Mr. Schu." Said Francoise, walking past the two teachers. "She doesn't like to be kept waiting!"

"You got it!" Mr. Schu called back to her. Mr. Schuester laughed nervously, turning back to Miss. Pillsbury.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"Hey, Sue! You wanted to see me?" Mr. Schu asked, walking into the coach's office.

"Hey, buddy! Come on in!" The coach got off her treadmill. "I just blasted my hammies."

"Oh." Mr. Schu shut the door.

"Iron Tablet?" Coach Sue asked.

"Uh..." replied a confused Mr. Schu.

"Keeps your strength up while you're menstruating." Coach threw him a medicine bottle.

"I don't menstruate." The teacher replied.

"Yeah? Neither do I. So I had a little chat with Principal Figgins, and he said if your group doesn't place at Regionals, he's cutting the program." She clicked her tongue. "Ouch."

"You know, you don't have to worry about glee club. We're gonna be fine."

"Really?" Coach Sue glared at the teacher. "Cause I was at the local library, where I read Cheer-leading Today a loud, to blind geriatrics. And, I came across this little page turner." Coach pulled 'Show Choir Rules' out of her desk. "And, it turns out you need twelve kids to qualify for regionals. Last time I looked you only had five and a half. Here, cripple in the wheel chair." Sue said, addressing the teacher's confused face. "I also took the liberty of highlighting some special ed classes for you. Maybe you could find some recruits, because I'm not sure there's anybody else who's gonna want to swim over to your island of misfit toys." Coach handed Mr. Schu the book and a paper, then proceeded to lift some weights.

"Are you threatening me, Sue?"

"Threatening you? Oh, no, no, no. Presenting you with an opportunity, to compromise yourself? You betcha." The Coach put her weights down, and walked over to the office. "Let's break it down. You want to be creative. You want to be in the spot light. Face it, you want to be me!" Mr. Schuester laughed at her.

"So here's the deal: you do with your depressing little group of kids, what I did with my wealthy elderly mother. Euthanize it. It's time. And, I'll be happy to offer you a job as my second assistant on Cheerios. You can fetch me Gatorade, launder my soiled delicates, it'll be very rewarding work for you."

"You know what, Sue? I politely decline your offer. Glee club is here to stay. I believe in my kids. I know you're used to being the cock of the walk around here..."

"Offensive" Sue muttered.

" But it looks like your Cheerios are gonna have some competition. We're going to Regionals. You have my word on that." Mr. Schuester tossed Sue the iron tablets back, and opened the door. "Have a good day."

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

Jessica was at her locker, listening to the conversation taking place between Alfred Jones and Francoise Bonnefoy.  
"We are in line to be the most popular kids in school, for the next couple of years." Francoise whisper shouted.

"Yeah, I know.:" Alfred replied.

"Prom King and Queen! Homecoming court royalty! I'm not giving up those shiny crowns, just so you can 'Express yourself!"

"Look, you're making a big deal outta this. Too big!" Alfred stated.

"Okay, let's compromise." Francoise said sweetly. "If you quit the club, I'll let you touch my breast." This definitely caught Alfred's attention.

"Under the shirt?"

"Over the bra." Alfred seemed a bit upset.

"No, no. I can't. I wanna do glee. I- I'm really happy when I'm preforming." Alfred shoved some books into his locker.

"People think you're gay now, Al. And you know what that makes me? Your big gay beard!" She shouted.

"Look, I-I-I gotta go to class." Alfred shut his locker, and walked away. Jessica looked at Alfred as he walked away.

"Eavesdrop much?" she shouted. Francoise walked closer to her, as Jessica shut her locker.

"Time for some girl talk, man hands." Francoise snapped. "You can dance with him, you can sing with him, but you will never have him."

"I understand why you'd be threatened. Alfred and I do dance together, and sing duets. But, I'm an honorable person. I don't need to steal your man away. I have plenty of suitors of my own." She perked up as she said the last part. "Everyday glee's status is going up, and yours is going down." Jessica began to walk away. "Deal with it." She turned around, only to get a face full of slushi. And, if that was bad enough another slushi followed.

"Holla!" Somebody called behind her.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"Ah, freak out~!" Everyone sang, stepping into a circle.

"Le freak, c'est chic!"

"Energy guys!" Mr. Schu called.

"Freak out!" They sang again, forming into a line.

"It's disco!" Mr. Schu yelled over the singing.

"Le freak, c'est chic!" They all span out out the line.

"Ah, freak out!"

"Good with the hands! John Travolta hands! Alright?"  
"Le freak, c'est chic! Have you heard about the new dance craze." They all formed into a line.

"Big fun!" Amanda kicked in front of Lydia. Big mistake.

"Whoa, whoa! Hell to the no!" Lydia screeched. Amanda had pissed her off earlier that day, and now was gonna get it. "First of all!" She turned to Amanda. "You try to bust my face again, and I will cut you!" She turned to Mr. Schu. "And also, this song is terrible!"

"I thought you liked this song?" Jessica butted in.

"Not when a bunch of tone death people are singing it!"

"Okay, no, no. It's not the song. You guys need to get into it!" Mr. Schu stated.

"No, it's the song!" Arthur clarified. "It's really gay." Everyone chuckled at his comment, no one ever thought that would come out of his mouth.

"We need Modern music, Mr. Schu." Matthew explained. Mr. Schu jumped a bit, forgetting Matthew was there.  
"I'm sorry guys. We don't have time to discuss this." Mr. Schuester headed over to the piano. "We're doing this song, this Friday, at the pep assembly."

"In F-Front of the whole school?" Lydia asked, getting sudden stage fright.

"Exactly!"

"They're gonna throw fruit at us!" Arthur declared.

"And, I just had a facial!" Amanda squealed.

"I'll press charges if that happens." Lydia said.  
"Guys, I can't express to you how important this assembly is. We need recruits. There are six of you. We need twelve to qualify for Regionals. We have no choice or, the club is over. I know you guys don't like this song, but we took nationals back in '93 with freak out. It's a crowd pleaser. Trust me. From the top!"

"I'm dead." Scoffed Alfred, as they all went back to their places.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"You need to call me before you dress yourself." Amanda told Jessica.

"Whatever, whatever." Jessica snapped back.

"You look like a technicolor zebra." Amanda said.

"You're a hater." Jessica stated.

"And, I look like I'm a partier."

"You're a hater, that's what you are. You're trying to copy me."

"It looks like I planned my outfit."

"All right, guys!" Mr. Schu said, walking into the choir room. "How about a little Kanye?" All the students cheered.

"For the assembly?" Lydia asked.

"No, we won't be ready in time." Mr. Schu began to pass out all the sheet music. "We're still doing disco. But, we can fold this into our repertoire. And, it'll be awesome at Regionals! Communication is the foundation of any successful music group. If we're gonna succeed we need to communicate! You guys said you wanted modern music, I listened."  
"Mr. Schu, we'd really like to not do disco at that assembly." Matthew stated.

"Al, you're gonna take the solo."

"What? N-No I can't do the solo, Mr. Schu!" Al chocked out. "I'm still learning- learning... how to walk and sing at the same time."

"No problem." Mr. Schu took his jacket off. "I'll walk you through it."

"Ooh!" Everyone called like second graders.

"Amanda, you know this?"

"Oh, I got this!" Amanda laughed. "_She take my money!_" Amanda sang. "_When I'm in need. Yeah, she's a trifling friend indeed. Oh, she's gold digger. Way over town! That digs on me." _

"_She give me money!" _All the students sang.

"_Now, I ain't saying she a gold digger." _Mr. Schu sang.

"_When I'm in need!"_

"_But, she ain't messing with no broke, broke." _

"_She give me money, when I'm in need." _

"_Now I ain't saying she a gold digger. But, she ain't messing with no broke." _

"_If you ain't no crook holler we want pre-nup!" _

"_We want pre-nup!" _All the students hollered.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

Miss. Pillsbury handed Amanda, 'So you like throwing up' pamphlet.

"Amanda, bulimia is a serious disease." Miss. Pillsbury got herself some hand sanitizer.

"I don't have bulimia." Amanda said, putting the pamphlet down. "I tried it and failed, and won't ever attempt it again."

"Okay."

"It grossed me out."

"Okay, but I still want to talk about the feelings that you had that led up to you wanting to puke your guts out."

"I want to be thinner." The student stated flatly. "And prettier like that Isabelle girl."

"Mmm-hmm, and um, why is that"

"Have you ever liked somebody so much, you just wanna lock yourself in your room, turn on sad music and cry?" Miss. Pillsbury recalled every day when she left work.

"No." She lied. "Uh, but a boy crush huh? I know about that, I mean not now. It takes me back in the day. Like, a long time ago I knew about that. You know what? You need to remember, Amanda. To protect your heart. I don't care who he is. If he doesn't like you for the way you are, or if he's... You know he's married with a baby on the way, that's not worth the heart ache." Miss. Pillsbury began to stare at Mr. Schuester. "You don't wanna compromise yourself for that. Um..." She cleared her throat. "Have you just tried telling him how you feel?" Amanda hung her head.

"He doesn't even notice me."

"I see. Um, okay, well, here's what I think. Common interests are the key to romance. Alright, so find out what he likes. Then he'll see you in a positive way and maybe you'll end up doing something you never expected." Amanda smiled and nodded her head.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

Jessica and Alfred sat in the principal's office, along with Mr. Schuester and Coach Sue.

"Would you like to tell Principal Figgins and Mr. Schuester what I caught you two doing?"

"It just sort of happened." Alfred said.

"I don't mean to be rude, but I think she's overreacting." Jessica told Principal Figgins.

"You watch you tongue, young lady!" The Coach yelled.

"Gay parents encourage rebellion, there's studies on this." Coach stated, referring to Jessica's two dads.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Tell me what happened Jessica." Mr. Schuester butt in.

"Alfred was worried about having to perform a solo at the pep assembly in front of his chromosomally- challenged friends. I was immediately concerned by his lack of self esteem, and made a creative preemptive strike."

"Yeah, pretty much what she said." Al said.

(Flashback)

"You know one of the amazing things about the preforming arts is that you can parlay into so many different fields. Like Justin Timberlake. He's a sing, but he also has a clothing line. You know, he makes things like shirts and belts."

"Who is Justin Timberlake?" Alfred asked, while cutting out pictures. The two sat in the art room, making flyers for glee club. They cut out pictures, glued them on to a piece of paper and went to the copier. They made a couple of copies and were about to leave. When, Coach Sue walked in...

(End of flashback)

"That Copy machine is for Cheerios use only!" Coach Sue yelled. "Paid for by alumni donations. I can't begin to fathom the damage you'd done to the program, gad you broken it."  
"Hold on a second, Sue." Mr. Schu interrupted.

"I resent being told to hold on to anything, William. I will not be treated like a second class citizen, because of my gender." Everyone exchanged confused looks. "That is a very clear bureaucracy when it comes to photocopies, and you seem to think that these procedures don't apply to your students. It is my strong recommendation that both these students be hobbled."

"How many copies did you guys make?" Mr. Schuester asked.

"17." Coach Sue, said with disgust.

"Okay, and how much does a photocopy cost?"

"Four and a half cents." Principal Figgins answered.

"How about they just pay for the copies?"

"I like this compromise." Principal Figgins said. "Children, pay Ms. Sylvester. And, we'll let you off with a warning."

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

Jessica and Alfred walked out of the school, glad they were able to get out of that. It was after school hours, and they were both waiting for people to pick them up.

"Uh, do you wanna practice for the assembly tomorrow after school?" Jessica asked.

"I can't. I got a Celibacy club meeting."

"Ame- Alfred you git! Get over here!" Arthur called.

"Sorry got to go." Alfred ran over and got in the car, leaving Jessica outside the school alone.

"What did you do?" Arthur asked, pulling out of the parking lot.

"Used the cheerios copy machine." Arthur chuckled.

"That Coach is a piece of work. Just don't do it again."

"You can't tell me what to do! I'm 246 years old! Oh, and stop almost calling me America."

"What am I supposed to do? I'm not used to having to call you by your human name all the time." Arthur turned on to the interstate, and if he were paying more attention he would noticed Lydia in the car beside him.

"Not say my name?"

"Seriously, America? Wow. That's the best you could come up with. Just do what I say."

"Hey! I may look sixteen, but I'm not! I usually look nineteen!" England rolled his eyes.

"Yes, and I usually look twenty three. But, we wouldn't quite fit in if we looked that, so you can thank my magic for fitting in. And, you know you don't have to be such an arse in school."

"Okay, first of all it's ass. And, that's just how high school works. The populars, the nobodies, then you. You know, I still don't get why we have to go to high school."

"Our bosses wanted us to have a basic knowledge of things. And, since your schools are the easiest to pass, here we are!"

"Whatever." Stated America. "Hey can we hang out with Canada, France, Spain, Poland, and Prussia after this? Wait, why did Prussia come? He doesn't even have a boss."  
"He didn't want to be left alone by the rest of the bad touch trio. And, no not all of us are going to get together it's a school night!" America rolled his eyes.

"Fine."

"So, what was going on between you and that girl?"

"Nothing."

"Sure."

"Dude, she's a human! Like no."

"Wow, and France is that much better."

"Totally!"

"Ridiculous."

Lydia's eyes widened as she heard the conversation. England turned to an exit, and Lydia sat there soaking in what she had just heard.

Lydia did the only she could think of when she got home, she called Jessica.

"Hello?" Jessica asked.

"Hey, it's me." Lydia answered.

"What do you want?"

"Do you think it's kind of weird all those foreign exchange students moved here in the same year?"

"I thought that's what they were supposed to do, since they transferred from the same school. Hetalia High or something. It's in Japan, remember?"

"Yeah, but have you noticed how Arthur keeps almost calling Alfred America?"

"Uh. How do you know?"

"Or, how Arthur will break down crying when the revolutionary war is brought up?"

"Well, he IS English."

"I don't think all the English do that."

"Whatever. Hey, will you go to the celibacy club with me tomorrow?"

"Why do you want to go there?" Lydia asked, not satisfied with how Jessica didn't know what she meant.

"Uh. They have a shortage of girls?"

"Are you asking me or telling me that?"

"Telling you?"

"NO!"

"Well, fine! See ya tomorrow."

"Now wait Jessica!" Too late, she had already hung up the phone. Lydia decided to keep this a secret for awhile, until she got more info. Her friends were obviously too stupid to notice, so matters fell into her hands.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

Francoise banged on the table.  
"The Celibacy club is now in session. Thanks to a school rule that says we have to let anyone join the club, we are welcoming three new members this week. Jessica Whatshername." The girl sat on the other side of the room than all the other girls.

"Where are all the boys?" Jessica asked.

"Down the hall. First half hour we separate. Then we come together to share our faith."

All the cheerleaders in the club. (A.K.A everyone else.) Got up. Isabelle spun around in her uniform.

"God bless the perv that invented these." She said.

"Remember the power motto, girls!" Francoise squealed.

"It's all about the teasing and not about the pleasing." All the girls spoke.

"Let's pair up for the immaculate affection." Francoise said, blowing up the last balloon. "Now remember, if the balloon pops the noise makes the angels cry." She proceeded to step up to Alfred and put the balloon between their crotches. Jessica's partner stepped up to her.

"You enchant me." He said. She felt like she was going to throw up. Meanwhile, Gilbert started grinding on the balloon between him and Isabelle.

"POP!" went a balloon.

"AL!" Francoise screamed.

"It must have hit my zipper!" Alfred defended.

"You know what? This is a joke!" Jessica said, backing away from her creepy partner.

"Did you know most studies has demonstrated celibacy doesn't work in high schools?Our hormones are driving us too crazy to abstain. The second we start telling ourselves there's no room for compromise, we act out. The only way to deal with teen sexuality is to be prepared. That's what contraception is for." Jessica explained.

"Don't you dare mention the 'C' word!" Francoise yelled. Jessica looked to Alfred.

"You want to know a dirty little secret that none of them want you to know? Girls want sex just as much as guys do!" The she stormed out.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"I officially call this meeting of the glee club in session!" Jessica spoke proudly.

"But Mr. Schuester isn't her." Matthew said.

"Mr. Schuester isn't coming." Jessica continued. "I paid a freshman to ask him for help with irregular verbs." Amanda groaned.

"I'm so bored!" She complained.

"Let her talk." Arthur said.

"I have another idea for the assembly. They're not gonna kill us, because we're gonna give them what they want."

"Blood?" Lydia asked, hopefully.

"Better, sex." Jessica said.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"Silence, Children." Principal Figgins said, through the microphone. "First an announcement, the toilets are broken again. We are fixing the problem, but let me warn you. There will be zero tolerance for anyone soiling school grounds. We're not going to have a repeat of last time. We have a great treat for you guys today. Mr. Schuester."

"Yay glee! Glee kids hooray!" Miss. Pillsbury called in the silent gym.

"Hi. Uh, when I went to school here, Glee club ruled this place. And we're on our way back. But, we need some recruits to join the party. Now, I could tell you all about how great Glee is but I think I'm gonna let some friends of mine show you instead." The curtains to the stage rolled back, and Mr. Schu took a seat.

"_Get up on this!" _All the girls sang out.

"_Get up on this! Ooh! Baby, baby. Ooh! Baby, baby!" _The girls repeated.

"_Push it!" _The guys sang.

"_Hey!" _They all then did some dance moves I do not care to describe, just watch glee episode two. They song continued, with some questionable lyrics and dancing.

"_Push it!" _ They all finished. The gym was silent.  
"YES!" Screamed a boy, and the gym roared with applause. The students jumped up, and whistled.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

Jessica stood outside the principal's office, waiting for Mr. Schu to come out. Coach Sue walked by her.

"You cut my budget! I will not stand for this! Glee club will fall!" She screamed.  
"Mr. Schuester I'm sorry." She said to the teacher.

"Do you understand what you did today? You lied to me. And you ruined our chances. No parent in their right mind is gonna let their kid join glee now. Oh, and, uh, here's a list of the songs we're aloud to sing." Jessica took the list.

"What's a Luftballoon?" she asked.

"Look, I know how much you care about Glee club. And I understand why you did what you did. But I don't like the way you did it." The teacher walked away.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"Let me get this straight. You're joining Glee club?" Coach Sue asked.

"I'm sorry, Coach Sylvester, but something is going on in there. Please don't kick us off the cheerios." Francoise said.

"Cease fire on the waterworks, I don't wanna hear it, I don't wanna see it. You know, when I first layed eyes on you, I was reminded of a young Sue Sylvester."

"Actually she way older than you." Isabelle whispered.

"Though you don't have my bone structure." Coach added. "But it wasn't until this very moment I saw how alike we really are. You two are going to be my spies, I need eyes on the inside. We're going to bring this club down from within."  
"And, I'm gonna get my boyfriend back." Francoise said happily.

"I don't care so much about that." Coach muttered.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"You're giving Francoise Bonnefoy the solo?" Jessica asked Mr. Schu. "That's my solo."

"You made this happen, Jessica. You were the one who wanted to sell sex at the assembly. Francoise's audition was on Figgin's approved list, and frankly she did a heck of a job singing it."

"You're punishing me." Jessica argued.

"Contrary to your beliefs, it's not all about you. Or, I've realized, about me. Look, I screwed up too. I'm as responsible for what you did at that assembly as you are. I should never have pushed disco so hard. When we did it back in 93 the disco revival was in it's heyday. It was cool, and we had fun doing it. We're on our way to success. Just try to let others be in the spotlight." Mr. Schu grabbed his bag.

"Can I use the auditorium later to practice?" Jessica asked. "Our neighbors are filing a law suit."

"Sure." Mr. Schuester walked out. Jessica looked down, that was her solo. But, maybe she could be charitable enough to give it up.

Hetalia glee club.

**~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~**

**My friend told me to put a footnote, so hello. **

**Uh, I don't really know what to say...**

**Reviews are appreciated...**

**I don't really know what pairings to put in, so suggest one? **

**Okay, bye...**


	3. Acafellas

"5,6,7,8!" Mr. Shue (That is apparently how you spell it...) called out to the glee club. "Step and Step." The piano played in the background, while the students tried to follow the dance moves Mr. Shue was doing. "And, turn it around."

"Can we stop please?" Jessica asked.

"You don't have to ask me for permission to go to the bathroom every time, Jessica. You can just go." Mr. Shue reminded her.

"It's not my bladder. It's the choreography."

"Okay, what's wrong with the choreography?" Mr. Shue asked.

(Flashback)

Jessica stood in the hallway, listening to the two cheerleaders tell her what was wrong.

"It sucks!" Francoise stated.

"It's completely unoriginal." Isabelle followed.

"Aren't you guys gonna get shunned for talking to me?" Jessica asked, holding tightly onto her text books.

"Sweetie, we're a team now." Francoise smiled. "But, you've got to do something about Mr. Shue's dance routines."

(End of flashback)

"We can't compete with Vocal Adrenalin with these steps." Jessica said.

"You mean that fancy team whose won Nationals eight years in a row?" Lydia asked.

"Yes." Jessica turned to Lydia, and back to the teacher. "You're a great vocal coach, Mr. Shue, but your not a..." She swallowed looking over Francoise. "Trained choreographer." Mr. Shue looked at the ground. "That what we need to be the best. We need Dakota Stanley."

(Flashback)

"He's the best Show choir choreographer in the mid-west!" Francoise beamed. "He works with Vocal Adrenaline."

Jessica walked awkwardly in between the two girls, while trying to take in all this information.

"You can't take regionals without him." Isabelle continued. "He was the understudy to the candelabra in Beauty and the Beast. On Broadway~!"

(End of flashback)

"Just because he understudied doesn't mean he ever performed." Mr. Shue shot back.

"Did you ever perform, Mr. Schuester?" Francoise stepped up.

"Bitch." Lydia said under her breath, only to get hit by Amanda. And, also get a dirty look from Alfred.

"Do that one more time, and I will take your arm off with a meat cleaver." Lydia whisper yelled to Amanda.

"After high school. Did you even try?" Francoise asked, ignoring the other girls.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"I wanted to. That was my dream, you know?" Mr. Shue explained to Miss. Pillsbury. "I-I just never had..."

"The guts?" Miss. Pillsbury cut in, still cleaning her plant. "They say it takes more certainty than talent to be a star. I mean look at John Stamos."

"I don't know. I guess I'm just nervous about being a dad." Mr. Shue said, sitting in a chair in front of the woman's desk. "I want my kid to be proud of me. I want to set a good example, you know?" Miss. Pillsbury nodded. "I-I hope it's cool me unloading on you like this. I don't want there to be any awkwardness."

"Oh, no. No, none at all." Miss. Pillsbury lied. "Oh, I mean you know, especially since we're, um, both in relationships now. It's both of us."

"Right." Mr. Shue agreed. Now, feeling more awkward than ever.

"I'm in a relationship. You're in a relationship." Miss. Pillsbury continued.

"How's it going with Ken?" Mr. Shue asked.

"Great. It's great. It's wonderful. I mean, you know, he's-he's flawed. But, he knows who he is and that's great. There really is nothing sexier in a man than confidence, you know?" Mr. Schuester gave a wry laugh.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

Hetalia glee club.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"Sandy!" Mr. Shue said, seeing the old glee teacher Jessica had gotten fired. "I thought you weren't allowed on campus."

"No, William. I'm not allowed within fifty feet of children." The Ex-teacher corrected, going back to filing his nails. "Besides Henri and I go way back. I got him a job before we even had a shop class. I told Figgins that you are going to have a school full of nannies unless you get some hot wood in those teenagers hands." Mr. Shue's eyebrows raised at that last comment. Dirty mind? I think yes.

"Here comes Henri." The gym teacher, Ken, whispered.

"Oh, shoot. Terri was supposed to bring a cake." Mr. Shue was referring to his wife, who currently worked at sheets and things.

"I'm back." Said a depressed looking man. He held up his hand, to reveal them wrapped in bandages. You see, Henri had a little problem with over the counter cough medicine. While using a saw, he ended up cutting off both his thumbs he was in such a haze. It was a real tragedy. Howard, he remembered the man's name to be.

"I'll never hitchhike across Europe. That was a dream, man." Henri said, taking a sip of his coffee. The room was silent, until a little Mexican man that worked with Mr. Shue's wife walked in.

"Where's Terri?" Mr. Shue asked.

"Doing inventory. I can't count higher than thirty." The man answered. The cake was set in front of Henri, to reveal the saying two thumbs up with two fondant hands doing thumbs ups.

Henri tried to figure out how to use his fork, but gave up and just ate the thumb off the hand.

"You know, this is nice." Mr. Shue said, breaking the awkward silence. "I can't remember the last time I just hung out with the guys, and really talked about our feelings."

"Want to know what I'm feeling?" Ken asked. "I live at the YMCA. I only have one pair of long pants."

"Oh, please. My life is a disaster with no creative outlet. Other than writing my desperate housewives fan fiction." Sandy cut in.

"I'm afraid of my vacuum." Howard choked out.

"I know how you guys feel. I apparently can't dance." Mr. Shue complained.

"I don't have thumbs." Henri said.

"Sorry..." Mr. Shue said, giving him a pat on the back. Of course this only made Henri sob.

"_For he's a jolly good fellow~!" _Sandy sang.

"_For he's a jolly good fellow..." _The others joined in.

"_For he's a jolly good fellow, that nobody can deny." _They four harmonized.

"Hey, that was pretty good." Mr. Shue smiled.

(Proceed to Mr. Shue's monologue thing.)

'Two weeks ago, I would have agreed that four grown men rehearsing a capella hip hop, in my living room was embarrassing. But, busting out some white hot New Jack swing... I'll tell you I've never felt more confident. Henri thought we should call our group, Crescendudes. While Ken thought, Testostertones, was more manly. And, then we heard a single word leave Howard's lips and we knew we had our name. Acafellas.'

Mr. Shue opened the door to his apartment.

"I'm ready for my close up, Mr. DeMille~!" Sandy spoke sang.

"Sandy, we voted. When you're in the group, it's creepy." Mr. Shue then proceeded to shut the door. After awhile more of the Acafellas rehearsing...

"Will!" Terri, his pregnant wife, called. "If I don't get some sleep, I could Miscarry." Not to mention she wasn't really pregnant. Yeah, she could definitely miscarry.

"I'm sorry, Terri. I'll be right in." Mr. Shue apologized.

"I hope so." She said, walking back into the bedroom.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

Lydia walked up to Jessica, with a plate full of cookies that read 'I'm sorry.'

"I don't know what the occasion is, but thank you!" Jessica said, reaching for one. Lydia swatted her hand away.

"These are not for you!" Lydia yelled. "You are going to take these to Mr. Shue, apologize, and get our teacher back!" Lydia then handed her the cookies, and turned her around. "Oh, and I get full credit fot the baking~!" Lydia then pushed Jessica away.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

Jessica walked into the glee room.

"He's not coming." She said, still holding the plate.

"What happened?" Alfred asked.

(Flashback)

"Lydia made them, and now I'm giving them to you~!" Jessica smiled. "I wanted to say how sorry I was for what I said."

"Don't be. You were right." Mr. Shue said, going back to grading papers. "You know the truth is, Jessica, if you weren't so hard on me I never would have had the guts to start Acafellas."

"But, we need you Mr. Shue. You've missed six rehearsals in the past couple of weeks, and when you're there you're not really there."

"Which is why I think you should go ahead and hire Montana."

"Dakota." Jessica corrected.

"Whatever." The teacher stood up. "You know I'll still be there to help you guys sing and stuff. But, uh, I just don't have time for all of it anymore."

(End of Flashback)

Jessica set the tray down on the piano.

"Of course he doesn't want anything to do with us after you kicked him in the nads!" Alfred yelled, obviously pissed.

"Then, why did he thank me?" Jessica asked.

"The goal is to win." Isabelle butted in. "And now that Mr. Schuester had agreed to let us hire Dakota Stanley, we can."

"But he doesn't want us to, he just doesn't have the confidence to coach us anymore." Arthur said, trying to keep from an argument. But, he just boiled one up.

"Yeah." Alfred agreed. "Guys are real sensitive when it comes to this kind of stuff."

"And, that's MY fault?" Jessica asked.

"Do you see anyone else in here with a plate of 'I'm sorry' cookies? I don't. Just you." Alfred commented.

"I'm bored." Francoise said. "All those in favor of hiring Dakota Stanley?" Everyone raised their hand, but Alfred.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

Jessica walked down the halls, only to be met by a face she did not want to see. Alfred.

"Hey wait up!" He called. "You can't do this to Mr. Schuester."

"What? Make him a hero?" Jessica asked. "Once we hire Dakota and win Nationals, he'll thank me for it. You heard Isabelle. It's all about winning."

"One. I'm the only hero!" Alfred beamed. "And, two. Since when is it all about winning?"

"Look, you have your popular clique and football, and your cliche but blonde girlfriend. Glee is my one shot. If this doesn't work out, my whole high school life will be nothing, but an embarrassment."

"What's a cliché? Is that a bad thing? Wait, wait, wait!" Alfred walked in front of Jessica, and stopped her. "Is this one of those chick things when you're pissed about one thing, but you just pretend like your pissed about something else?"

"I don't know what you're talking about." Jessica said.

"Well, for awhile there we were like friends and now you just yell at me all the time. It kind of makes me think you're upset about how I blew you off, or something."

"I'm not." Jessica walked away. "I couldn't care less. I was just focusing on my career, and I'm perfectly fine with practicing alone."

"Do you want to talk?" Alfred grabbed her shoulder.

"No!" She swiped his hand off of her, and turned to him. "It's kind of ironic how you're Mr. Popular and I'm just this zero who everyone makes fun of, and you think we can be friends. This is high school things don't work like that. We're hiring Dakota Stanley. I have to get to math."

"Even if it means me quitting?" Alfred asked. Jessica stood there for a moment.

"Yes." She choked out.

"Good job!" Lydia said, passing by.

"Seriously?"

"Well, that expression on his face was priceless! The only other place I've seen him do that is in Science class." Lydia laughed.

"Yeah, well, whatever. Hey, you want to roller blading later?"

"Sure~!" Lydia agreed, heading off to Science.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"It's a good start." Coach Sue said, on her stair climber. "You're sewing the seeds of destruction."

"Mr. Schuester, barely even shows up for rehearsals." Isabelle said confidently.

"Oh, no, no, no. Barely will not cut it. I will not be satisfied until Glee club is disbanded. And, what about this Dakota character? Any chance he actually helps?" Francoise smiled and shook her head.

"They're soft. He'll eat them alive. I give them fifteen minutes before the first one quits or tries to commit suicide." Sue got off her stair climber, and grabbed a towel.

"You know, ladies?" She said, sitting at her desk. "I learned a lot in special forces. I was on the strike team in Panama when we extracted Noriega. We took out the Sheppard. Then, we went after the sheep... You need to go after these glee clubers one by one. I want my full budget restored. I need a fog machine."

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

Amanda watched jealously as all the happy couples passed by her.

"Have you ever kissed anybody?" Amanda asked Arthur, while he was at his locker.

"Yes. Several somebodies." He responded.

"What's it like?" She asked.

"Well, at first it's amazing and then they go and break your heart. I guess I just haven't found the one yet..." He said, a little depressed.

"You couldn't of had your heart broken that much. We're only in tenth grade..." Amanda responded. Arthur sighed.

"Yeah, well it has felt like thousands of years to me." He closed his locked and walked off. Jessica walked over, and saw Amanda looking over at Isabelle and Gilbert kissing.

"Okay stop it right there, Amanda. We are in Glee club. That means we are the bottom of the social heap. Special ed kids will get more play than we will. The only thing that gets me by is my knowledge that we ate superior to all of them. Gotta run~!" Jessica ran off, while Amanda rolled her eyes.

"Just ignore her." Lydia said, walking by. "She's an idiot."

"You don't get it, you at least had a boyfriend once." Amanda snorted.

"That was a long time ago!" Lydia yelled. "And, if it makes you feel better Jessica has never had one~!"

"It should, but it doesn't..." Amanda trailed off.

"Tell you what. Let's go to the mall after school." Lydia smiled.

"You hate the mall."

"But, you don't. Meet me at lunch." With that Lydia was gone too. Amanda smiled. She was lucky to have such great friends...

"You know, you and Arthur should totally get together." Francoise said, taking her arm.

'I'm working on it!' Amanda thought. "I don't think I'm his type." She lied.

"Oh, I think you are~!" Isabelle said, taking her other arm.

"Just follow our lead, we've got your back." Francoise said sweetly.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"Well?" Henri asked.

"Is it too soon to call Will Schuester the next Micheal Buble? The audience last Thursday at Beanchwarmers sports bar didn't seem to think so." Mr. Shue read out of a news paper. "And, Ken Tanaka's smoky baritone is like a cool fog when it sweeps over a deep ocean of emotion. A big thumbs up to Henri st. Pierre. Who proved you don't need all ten fingers to pluck a lady's heart strings like a well tuned harp. Only Howard-" Mr. Shue stopped, while Howard waited with a big smile on his face. "Sorry Howard, they didn't say anything about you." Mr. Shue lied. "Buckle up, Ohio. Are you ready for a new musical sensation? Here comes the Acafellas." Ken and Mr. Shue gave a high five.

"Oh, congratulations on your dead tree valentine, gentlemen." Sandy said, walking into the teacher's lounge. "By the way, I want in."

"No, Sandy! We have standards." Said Mr. Shue.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"Damn Arthur! This car is awesome!" Amanda said, getting out of the awesome car.

"I got it a couple of years ago..." Arthur said.

"You could drive then?" Asked a suspicious Lydia.

"No. My dad used it, then gave it to me." Arthur saved. Everyone started walking towards the large building.

"Are we even sure the rehearsing today?" Isabelle asked.

"Vocal Adrenaline rehearses everyday form two thirty until midnight!" Jessica said. Arthur linked arms with Amanda, just because they were walking by each other. Jessica looked over at Lydia.

"I'm so nervous these Vocal Adrenaline kids are gonna laugh at us." Amanda whined. "They're so cool and popular, and we look like we just stepped off the short bus."

"Those blokes have just had more time to practice. We have more heart. And, you look very pretty don't second guess yourself." Arthur assured her.

"So, would you ever... You know? Wanna hang out?" Amanda asked.

"Come over, I watch Doctor Who all the time." Arthur smiled.

"Guys! That's Andrea Cohen she won outstanding solo last year, and did an amazing job doing it!" Jessica squealed, looking at the girl throwing up in the garbage can.

"You can't leave rehearsals for any reason. That includes heat exhaustion." Said another girl.

"Are you guys Vocal Adrenaline? We'd like to talk to Dakota Stanley about choreographing our Glee club." Jessica said.

"Don't!" Andrea said. "He's a monster."

The Glee kids ignored her, and saw someone walk out. Assuming it was Dakota, they followed him.

"Mr. Stanley, we're the McKinley high Glee club." Jessica yelled.

"No interviews." He said, getting into his car.

"We'd like you to choreograph for us!" Lydia called.

"Look, my fee is eight thousand dollars per number. Plus a ten thousand dollar bonus if you place in the top three. And, with Dakota Stanley you will place in the top three. Move it." He then drove off.

"How are we gonna get eight thousand dollars?" Jessica asked.

"Don't forget the extra ten thousand!" Lydia shouted, happily.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

Mr. Shue was rehearsing steps in the choir room with Ken.  
"Where is everybody?" Ken asked.

"Sandy went to get Henri from wood shop." Mr. Shue picked up his phone. "Oh, there's Howard. Hello?"

"I don't think I can be in the band anymore." Howard said.

"What?"

"I'm doing inventory. It was never my dream." With that, he hung up. Mr. Shue put his phone away.

"Howard's out." Ken groaned.

"Oh, that-that's just great." Ken turned around, to see Miss. Pillsbury. "Hey. Emma." He smiled.

"Look, I have some bad news." She said, looking at her shoes.

"You're breaking up with me." Ken said flatly. "What, here? In front of another dude?"

"No, look, please stop talking. I think the Acafellas pressure has proven to be a little too much for Henri."

"Really, why?" Asked Mr. Shue.

"Well, he just downed six bottles of cough syrup. Which is a lot, even for him. Um, he's okay. Sandy's in the emergency room with him right now, but Figgins is insisting before he comes back, and can be around kids again... That he goes to rehab. So, that's where he's going tomorrow morning."

"That's just great." Ken said. "So, Acafellas is officially doomed now." He walked away. "I'm going to the gym."

"It was fun while it lasted." Mr. Shue said.

"I don't think you should give up so easy, Will. You know, they say Van Halen was dead after David Lee Roth quit, but my worn out single of 'Right Now' says that they were wrong." She smiled and walked away.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

Mr. Shue began to type up an ad for the Acafellas. When Alfred knocked on the door.

"You got a sec, Mr. Shue." Alfred asked.

"Yeah, of course. What's up?"

"I just wanted to tell you I'm quitting glee, too."

"I didn't quit glee!" Mr. Shue protested.

"Well, you might as well of." Alfred laughed off. "It's nutty in there. I tried to talk sense into Jessica."

Lydia was conveniently walking by.

"That's a waste of your time, bro. I've been trying for at least thirteen years." She then continued walking to her next class.

"Uh, okay. But, she's gone all chick-batty. I gotta be honest with you. It's hard to be quarterback when I get in the huddle and all the guys are calling me deep throat. Glee is bringing down my rep, man."

"Have the guts to stick with it a little bit longer. You are a gifted performer, Al. You can't quit now. If you do, you're gonna regret it. Trust me. I know."

"It's just not fun anymore." Mr. Shue sighed, and looked over at the ad.

"Hey, Al wait. There's something I wanted to talk to you about."

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

Ken sighed.

"Hey, coach." Gilbert asked, wiping his sweat off a towel.

"What do you want Belishmidt."

"I heard there's a vacancy in your a capella group. I want to offer my services. I play guitar. And actually, I'm a really good singer. There are a lot of moms at your gigs, right? When do we start rehearsals?" Ken grabbed the collars of Gilbert's shirt and pulled him upward.

"Now you listen to me, you little psychopath. My love life is hanging by a thread and that thread is Acafellas. It drives my girlfriend nuts in the pants. So if you screw this up for me, I swear to you I will stick my fists so far down your throat you will taste my armpit hairs. Do I make myself clear?" Gilbert nodded. "Good." Ken released the student. "We rehearse Tuesdays and Thursdays at eight. Don't be late."

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

Amanda was getting books from her locker, when Jessica and Lydia walked up. You could almost hear the jaws theme song as Jessica spoke up.

"We need to have a gayvention. That's gay intervention." Amanda rolled her eyes.

"It's Arthur." Lydia said. "He's lady fabulous."

"It's obvious you like him." Jessica continued, annoying the crap out of Amanda. "We just don't want you to get hurt by feeling he can't...return..."

"Look, just because he wears suits and blazers doesn't mean he's on the down-low." Amanda protested.

"He was talking to some 'flying mint bunny' during second period." Jessica whispered.

"God, that guy is insane." Lydia muttered, getting a death stare from Amanda. "Oh, don't pretend like he's not!" Lydia argued.

"You can do better, Amanda." Jessica said, dismissing Lydia's comments.

"Really? Well, what if I can't? You know there's not a lot of guys around here knocking down my door for a date. Or yours, for that matter." Amanda said giving Jessica a look. Jessica narrowed her eyes, and well, stuck out her tongue like a first grader. "Nobody notices us. Hello? We're in glee club. And, I'm tired of being lonely aren't you? But Arthur, Arthur is sweet to me. And he likes who I am, and I like who I feel when I'm with him. He's in our group, he understands what I'm going through. Well, maybe that's not enough for you guys. But, it's enough for me." Lydia rolled her eyes.

"Amanda, he's just not that into you because he's a cou-" She caught herself. "Creep." She got an odd glance, but huzzah! Saved herself! Amanda walked away, all pissed off and not wanting to talk.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"You know what, Sue? I gotta say. I really misjudged you. Getting the cheerios to help with the glee club choreography fundraiser is one of the nicest things I've ever seen." Miss. Pillsbury said, referring to the cheerios helping the car wash in bikinis.

"Well, Erma, I'm willing to do whatever it takes to make this glee club successful." Sue smiled.

Amanda started cleaning the hood of Arthur's dad's car.

"Did you bring a change of clothes, because we are going straight to Midsummer night's dream right after this." Amanda smiled.

"So, listen, Arthur. This is like the third time we've been out. Can we just make it official?" Arthur gave her a 'dafuq' look, and spoke up.

"Make what official?"

"You know, that we're dating!" Amanda hummed.

"I'm sorry, Amanda, but I thought I made it very clear."

"Made what clear?" Amanda asked.

"Uh, that I'm, uh, I'm. Uh. I'm love with someone else." Arthur saved, trying to hide the fact he was a country. He looked over at where he had her Lydia yell something.

"Lydia!?" Amanda screamed.

"What?!" Arthur yelled. "Uh, sure." He lied. Amanda couldn't take it, she was pissed. She reached down, grabbed a rock, and threw it at the car's windshield.

"Good job!" Lydia called. "I approve!" Arthur looked at his "dad's" car.

"My dad's car!" He yelled. "You broke the wind shield!"

"Well, you broke my heart." Amanda said, she then stormed off.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

Dakota began to pass papers out to the class.

"Okay, please examine your personalized menus. This is what you're going to be eating for the next six months."

"Um, mine just says coffee." Lydia said, very annoyed.

"She doesn't need coffee!" The rest of the students shouted.

"Okay, water." Dakota rolled his eyes.

"What's smelt?" Jessica asked.

"A pungent low carb fresh water fish." Dakota said. "Okay, let's start with today's business. Matthew you're cut. You're not trying hard enough."

"At what?" Matthew asked.

"At walking." Dakota gave them a 'duh' look. "We can't be wheeling you around during every number. It throws off the whole dynamic, and it's depressing."

"So, you're kicking him out?" Amanda asked.

"Mmm-hmm also you. You gotta go." Amanda looked like she was about to kill.

"You can't kick people out of glee club, because you don't like the way they look!" Arthur argued.

"Why don't you shut your face, and loose the accent. Because I have no idea what you just said." He looked at Isabelle and Francoise.

"You two, your great your perfect. Seriously don't change a thing." He moved on to Jessica.

"Uh, you. Ew, nose job."

"Hey, only I can say Jessica needs a nose job! She does, but that's beside the point!" Lydia yelled.

"Too violent." Dakota continued.

"Just hold on a second." Alfred said.

"What was that, Frankenteen? Why don't you get that dopey look off your face, and get some lotion for those knuckles you've been dragging on the ground." The extremely short man said to Alfred.

"What's wrong with you?" Alfred asked.

"What's wrong with me? What's wrong with you is that you're freakishly tall! I feel like a woodland creature!"

"I don't like this guy." Lydia said. She rolled Matthew away.

"Screw this." Alfred stated, walking with them. And, being followed by Amanda.

"Wait!" Jessica called. She turned to Dakota. "We don't need you."

"Where is this going?" Dakota asked.

"You're fired." Jessica said.

"And, I'm taller than you!" Lydia yelled!

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

The Acafellas stood on the stage, ready for the lights to turn up.

"_A tick top don't stop." _

"_Come inside take off your coat, I'll make you feel at home." _Mr. Shue sang.

"_Oh, oh, oh, oh!" _All sang behind him.

"_Disconnect the phone so nobody knows!" _Gilbert sang.

"_Oh, oh, oh, oh!" _All sang behind._ "I wanna sex you up!" _The crowd erupted into applause.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"Hey Arthur." Amanda smiled. "I just wanted to say I'm really sorry I did that to your car."  
"It's fine." He said. "Petrol prices were getting high."

"And, I just wanted to say. I hope it works out between you and Lydia. You'll make really loud babies."

"I lied to you." Arthur said. "I don't like Lydia. I just kind of freaked out." Amanda sighed.

"Well, that's a relief."  
"Friends?" Arthur asked.

"Friends."

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"This is what we call a total disaster, ladies. I'm going to ask you to smell your armpits." Coach Sue told the girls in front of her desk. Francoise and Isabelle hesitated, but smelled.

"That is the stench of defeat." Coach Sue continued. "And, it's stinking up my office. I'm revoking your tanning privileges for the rest of the semester." Isabelle began to cry, and ran out. Francoise got up to follow her.

"Miss. Sylvester I wanna thank you." Francoise said.

"For what?"

"For teaching me a valuable life lesson. When you really believe in yourself, you don't have to bring other people down."

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"Step ball change and head." Mr. Shue instructed. "And, low!"

"Mr. Shue!" Jessica interjected.

"Yes?" Mr. Shue asked, as the rest of the club groaned.

"It was really good!" Everyone laughed.

"Okay one more time!" Mr. Shue shouted.

**~:~:~:~:~:~:~  
**

**Hello... **

**The girl who is Lydia in this wanted me to inform you that she is being a hipster and reading this before it's online. That is all. Have a hetalia day. **


End file.
